+ 10 - 9 | § ¶My Second Mom

MJ (Mary Jane) Pirk Born May 4th 1930 Dalla Texas. Died Feb 25th 2008 Lakewood, Colorado.

How do you explain the relationship between moms and sons?
You don’t. Moms and sons don’t need an explanation. It’s just the way it is.

How do you explain the relationship between moms and daughters?
You don’t even try. Moms and daughters need encyclopedias - their own personal encyclopedias.

Ask a simple question of your son.
You get either a grunt or a simple “You know, Mom” or “I know, Mom.”

Ask a simple question of your daughter.
You will get the rock-hard, true facts of your family history since before written word.

MJ could do both with her simple, no frills responses.
MJ could take a bad situation and turn it into one of life’s so-so events.
She could make a crisis into a laughable situation.
She could take the good and make it outshine the bad.

Daughters say that their moms are opinionated and stubborn.
Sons won’t admit it out loud, but their moms are their rock and compass.

MJ depended on her faith in God. She felt safe within God’s arms. And no matter what happened, she always knew that everything would be OK. I think that’s why she went so peacefully. She had said everything she had to say.

Hard to believe, but when I met MJ, she was only in her 40’s. And I am now in my 50’s.
She inspired me for the last 35 years.

In some respects, she had already done more in her life by the time I met her than in the time I have known her.

She had married, lived in many places around the world, reared children, owned and kept a beautiful home. She loved working on the road as a pharmaceutical rep. She loved playing bridge. She loved volunteering for causes she felt were so important. She loved being part of her church. She loved being involved with anyone who touched her life.

I remember playing pool in the basement, watching TV in the family room, eating the most delicious meals, sitting around talking to everyone at the house, seeing the Christmas trees grow in the back yard.

We had such good times, MJ and I. We could talk for hours. MJ loved to talk about family, life, hopes, past lessons and future endeavors. MJ remembered everything. I could tell MJ how I felt about my own Mom and she would be able to help me with whatever issues came up between my Mom and me. She always let me know how important my Mom is to me. She understood and she gave me the right answers.

From the first time I came into her home, MJ welcomed me like we had known each other since the beginning of time. She took everyone into her life as they were, accepting us for what we were.

I had the privilege of MJ’s company here in California in the last year or so. I wanted her to feel as welcome here as she always made me feel whenever I came to visit her. She experienced the Santa Monica 3rd Street Promenade and the eclectic milieu of people mingling in this tiny piece of southern California .We ate at restaurants by the ocean, walked the Santa Monica Pier and marveled at the carousel, the local vendors, and the sea shore activities, and went to the race track.

She understood my passion for thoroughbred racing. She sat and watched the races last year with me in Colorado, knowing how important it was to me. She shared her past experiences growing up in that part of the country and the excitement of watching the races there.

MJ bet on some horses at Hollywood Park on Ken’s birthday. Steve was with us and she said to me, “Today is Ken’s birthday and I don’t think Steve remembers. Please don’t tell him. It is just so nice to be with him. I don’t want to make him feel bad.” The horses she bet on were Dancing Groom and Dixie Banker. Neither won but it was a nice sentimental thought.

I can only compare her to one of the greatest horses ever, Barbaro. After hearing of MJ’s surgery for colon cancer, my enthusiasm for life, like others, suffered a crushing blow.
The combination of dedicated doctors, a woman with an amazing spirit, and the eternal hope of her children caused me to look at this very sad event in a much more positive light. Everyone did what they could. There is always hope with cancer – so many advances. Would MJ beat the odds?

I knew that I had to remember MJ, if only for her dogged determination in her fight for survival. God knew that it was time.

I can only say to myself that MJ will always be right next to me, in thought and in prayer, always.

I love you, Becky, Steve, and (Mike) Dave. You have been a part of my life for so long and I will miss your Mom so much. And all of yours, may you grow up happy, safe and loved by all. Because that is what your Mom, your Grandma, wishes for you.

Love,
Tressa